"And to really trust God, we must begin to relax our grip and ease our concern about all the lesser sources of security to which we become attached. This can feel risky."
Gerald May "Addiction and Grace"
A few days ago I was chatting on the phone with a woman who had called for information about Seized by Hope Ministries and at one point during our conversation she said, "Oh, you really are living by faith and trusting God to provide."
Some days, I am living by faith.
Some days, I am living in sheer panic.
Most days it is a combination of the two.
This morning I was reading Jesus' words in Mathew 6 about worry....
"27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? 28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these."
The disciples walked away from their source of income to follow Jesus. We don't know for sure how they fed and clothed themselves. I suppose every once in awhile they may have put out to sea and pulled in few fish and sold them at market. I wonder how their wives were this choice?
We live in a culture that bombards us with the importance of financial security. Is your house paid off, how much debt do you have, what type of debt...secured or unsecured, do you have health insurance...is it "good", do you have savings, how much, what about retirement, how are you bracing yourself for the economic downturn that is going to become worse before it gets better.
How do we live out the truth of Jesus' words in the wake of this bombarding?
It feels complicated.
For me the bombarding surfaces my idolatry, my propensity to my trust in other things because where I expend my energy mentally and physically reveals the posture of my heart, what I see often grieves me.
To live our Jesus' words really...to trust God...really trust God....that would be foolishly risky by most people's standards.
Yet, I have known financially responsible, careful, prudent people who have found themselves faced with the loss of all they had, carrying debt they didn't know how they would ever pay off, having to decide to follow the call of God to trust Him or the call of the culture to figure something out in order to make themselves "secure" again.
Ultimately, we are all left at God's mercy, the choice is whether or not we will rest in the security of Him or spend our life energy trying to make ourselves financially secure.
I have been encouraged to think about presenting those who meet with me with a suggested donation. That's really just a creative way of charging for what I am doing. Every-time I think about it I cringe inside. Paul never talked about "suggested" donations, Jesus didn't either. There is really no biblical precedent for such a proposal. I am not in business, I am committed to ministering. I am committed to trusting God, really.
Pretty Risky.